Last month we were devastated to learn that we lost one of our most vibrant and active members of the Moorview Care family, Tiffany Pearson.
When you're part of a family, as we all are at Moorview Care, there is nothing more painful than losing a family member. But it is the strength of those family bonds that help us to get through when we are in great pain. We have seen our people and our team lean on each other in their shared grief and it goes to show how important our connections with our housemates, friends and work-family are.
Tiff was and will continue to be a true inspiration to all at Moorview Care and beyond. Tiff was supported by Moorview Care for 10 years and has shaped us all into the people and the carers we are today. She was a hard worker who wasn't afraid to get stuck in. Tiff was an active member of both Moorview Matters and Moorview Mentors - shaping how we run our organisation and even how we train the team. She was an advocate for people to be taught by "experts by experience" and offered her own expertise on many occasions. She was also one of our Co-production Champions, again having her say at each meeting, helping to steer Moorview Care on how we as a company and a team co-produce and collaborate with our fellow MVC family, the lovely people we support.
Tiffany's book, 'Bossing Life with a SCI' was released last year after 4 years of writing, editing and publishing. She was an advocate for those who find it hard to make themselves heard, participating in charity fundraising events, petitioning the government and taking part in many videos that she helped to produce for Moorview Care.
Over the past month, we have seen outpourings of respect, love and appreciation for the woman Tiff was and how much she meant to us. At Moorview Matters, the members undertook a minute of silence to pay their respects to Tiff. Her friend Georgia made a scrapbook with photos and we were encouraged by Team Member Natasha to light a candle or wear something pink in her memory. Her housemates George and Fran made a cake in her honour on what would have been her birthday and shared this along with a toast to Tiff that evening. Tiff had already signed up and received sponsorship for Race For Life this year, so some of Tiffany's Moorview Care family, Kiera and Fliss, completed it for her.
We all manage grief in our own way and some find processing bereavement it more difficult than others. We've put together a few tips which may help when managing your grief, in particular for those with learning disabilities.
Helpful tips to manage grief with a learning disability
If suffering a loss has made you think about dying or perhaps suffering another loss, discuss your fears and concerns about death with your Support Worker, a friend or a family member.
If you have any questions, ask! It's normal to be inquisitive or to want to fully understand a situation and where possible, your Support Worker will ensure you understand as much as possible and will explain facts to you, as long as it's useful and not too upsetting for you.
Suffering a loss is sad and it's ok to feel lots of emotions - whatever they may be so if you need to cry, that's ok. If you're angry, that's ok too. You might feel a mixture of emotions that you don't understand so if needed, lean on your friends, family, housemates and Support Workers.
Solidify your bond with the person you have just lost. If you had a bond when they were alive, that will last forever but making picture books, talking about fun times or watching videos of them will help you to feel close to them, even though they're no longer with you.
Most importantly, talk. Keep your communication channels open and don't suffer alone. We're all feeling sad, upset and devastated and talking about our feelings and leaning on one another is key to not only relieving some of our pain but also strengthening our bonds with those who are still with us.
Over the past 6 months, we've lost a few members of our Moorview Care family and each one of those inspiring individuals are and will always be missed by all. Colin, Christopher and Tiffany, may you all rest in peace.
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